Think about that for a moment....
People LIKE abusers when they first encounter them. That means you might honestly like an abuser when you first meet them. If abusers were repulsive humans then people would run the other direction right away and abuse simply wouldn't happen. This also means that some of the assumptions you have about an abuser might not be true.
1. Abusers are often physically attractive.
An abuser will use any resource they can to attract relationship and eventually create an environment where they have more control than their partner. Physical appearance is one way many abusers initially 'hook' new partners.
2. Abusers are not ONLY male.
Statistics show that only about 2% of males report themselves as victims of domestic violence. This is in part due to social expectations, but this also means that most abusive women are not reported.
3. Often abusers have LOTS of money.
Financial abuse is one form of abuse that can be extremely subtle, but it is also very common because finances offer a type of power that wealthy people understand better than most.
4. It is not uncommon for abusers to be influential in society.
They are sometimes pastors, CEO's of powerful companies and people in power more naturally know how to get people to want to help them.
5. Minors can (and DO) abuse their parents.
This is most commonly seen in households with an abusive parent. Children learn social skills from the adults that influence them the most. If they are witnessing abuse, then it is not difficult to understand why they might also act out similar behavior in their own relationships.
6. Alcohol and drugs don't 'cause' abuse.
While someone who has an abusive tendency is more likely to display abusive behavior when drinking, the alcohol or drugs are not the only reason they are choosing abusive behaviors.